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Off The Water
Watering Hole
Chemo's keeping me stuck inside, haven't fished in weeks!
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<blockquote data-quote="MiPikeGuy" data-source="post: 328609" data-attributes="member: 12227"><p>Wow, thanks for all the kind words guys. </p><p></p><p>I try to hope, but it's hard when the Dr.'s more or less tell me it's hopeless. They tell me they "might" be able to shrink it (which it did before) but it came back twice as strong afterwards. My migraines are worse than ever, my neck is swelled up like some crazy science experiment, yadda yadda yadda. </p><p></p><p>I guess what hurts the worst is seeing the look on my girlfriends face everytime I'm sick or in pain. If it was just me I had to worry about it, it would be one thing, but she doesn't deserve this kind of pain, regardless of her love for me. I know she wants a family and I'm pretty sure chemo fried my chances of that, considering we've been trying for a couple years now, and I know it bothers her. I also can't help but feel inadequate, money is always an issue, especially driving 60miles one way to treatment repeatedly. I feel like the hole is constantly getting deeper, and though I may be "healthy" or feel better at some point, I'm so far behind already that I feel I'll never be able to provide like I should for not just me, but her and with any luck, a family.</p><p></p><p>Again, thank you guys so much, an outside perspective is definitely nice to have. None of you had to reply to to me whining :lol: Feels good to get it off my chest.</p><p></p><p>I'm sure this won't be last last rant seeing as this is just my first cycle, and I'm just going to get sicker as the days/weeks progress, and eventually lead into radiation therapy along with chemo.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="MiPikeGuy, post: 328609, member: 12227"] Wow, thanks for all the kind words guys. I try to hope, but it's hard when the Dr.'s more or less tell me it's hopeless. They tell me they "might" be able to shrink it (which it did before) but it came back twice as strong afterwards. My migraines are worse than ever, my neck is swelled up like some crazy science experiment, yadda yadda yadda. I guess what hurts the worst is seeing the look on my girlfriends face everytime I'm sick or in pain. If it was just me I had to worry about it, it would be one thing, but she doesn't deserve this kind of pain, regardless of her love for me. I know she wants a family and I'm pretty sure chemo fried my chances of that, considering we've been trying for a couple years now, and I know it bothers her. I also can't help but feel inadequate, money is always an issue, especially driving 60miles one way to treatment repeatedly. I feel like the hole is constantly getting deeper, and though I may be "healthy" or feel better at some point, I'm so far behind already that I feel I'll never be able to provide like I should for not just me, but her and with any luck, a family. Again, thank you guys so much, an outside perspective is definitely nice to have. None of you had to reply to to me whining :lol: Feels good to get it off my chest. I'm sure this won't be last last rant seeing as this is just my first cycle, and I'm just going to get sicker as the days/weeks progress, and eventually lead into radiation therapy along with chemo. [/QUOTE]
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Off The Water
Watering Hole
Chemo's keeping me stuck inside, haven't fished in weeks!
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