Vote for the best Paraprosdokian . . .

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Best Paraprosdokian

  • 1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ... but it's still on my list.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

    Votes: 7 53.8%
  • 5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.

    Votes: 1 7.7%
  • 6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.

    Votes: 1 7.7%
  • 7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.

    Votes: 1 7.7%
  • 9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of emergency, notify..." I answered "a do

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer

    Votes: 1 7.7%
  • 12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

    Votes: 1 7.7%
  • 14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit 'the target.'

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

    Votes: 1 7.7%
  • 16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find one now.

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    13
  • Poll closed .

PATRIOT

Well-known member
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May 26, 2012
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Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is
surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous.
 
The late Leo Durocher really cracks me up with those - - -

I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes.
Show me a good loser and I'll show you an idiot.
When you come to a fork in the road, take it.

good subject !!

and I remember seeing one on your list of a different version.

You're never too old to learn how to do something stupid - TWICE
 
a friend of mine just posted this on facebook "i like to burn my bridges while i am standing on them so people know i'm serious about my crazy"
 

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